Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
