dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
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