marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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