I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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