All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Randomize