They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
