Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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