i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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