apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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