whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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