We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
