What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize