Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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