is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
