just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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