maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Randomize
