Where did you get a picture of my penis
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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