Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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