So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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