I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
