that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
and you fell through a lawn chair
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
