He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize