The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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