Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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