definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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