how can u be prego again
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
