You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
