I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
