i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize