Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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