I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
