Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
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