your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize
