Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
