garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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