ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
