just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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