Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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