Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
