If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
