I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
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