shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
