he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize