Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
