Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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