forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
