in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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