A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize