I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize