Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
