Plan B is the new Plan A
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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