Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize